Uncle Weird: September 2006

IT'S JUST NOT NORMAL.

AFTER 16 HOURS ON THE PISS.......

BIG TONE MAKES LITTLE TONE CHOKE ON HIS OWN VOMIT WITH HIS DULL CHAT.

WHAT CAN YOU SAY?

MATT LOOKS AFTER HIM WELL.

A FEW CHANGED LYRICS!

The bravest animals in the land are captain bryndol and his band. that's timid tone, jr rat, lard the owl and denz the bat. march through the woodlands singing songs that tell how they have righted wrongs........once pissing weird an evil snake, kept the woodland folk awake, in fear and trembling every night in case he gave someone a bite, said lard the owl were lie in wait and one of us will be the bait, said captain bryndol have no fear but i alone will volunteer. no make it me said jr rat, i'll stand there in my arsenal hat, when pissing weird picks up my trail, i'll just lasso him with my tail. good idea said timid tone, we'll hide along way from the road, when iv'e stopped boring these cunts, we'll rush along to you assistance........said denz the bat, iv'e got a wheeze, i'll hide young boys up in the trees, when pissing weird should slither by, i'll drop the saucepans from the sky.......said lard the owl, the idea's sound, but how would you lift them off the ground? poor denz the bat just scratced his cock, i hadn't thought of that he said.......said lard the owl, just hold back. there's only one that he'll attack, said timid tone i like your plan, good luck said lard, for your a cunt. so timid tone his pops a popping, into the woodland night went hopping. captain bryndol waved his hand, followed with his trusty band. that's lard the owl, jr rat and above the trees flew denz the bat........STOP said bryndol i hear squeaking, it's denz the bat said lard he's speaking, it's all in code said jr rat, said lard i'll just decipher that........a dash a dot two short two long, i rather hope he's got it wrong, it reads can clearly see a man, pissing weirds been bored by tran.....quick men said bryndol no delay, we musn't let them get away, and leaping off said follow me, and ran head first into a tree....... dot dot dot squeaked denz the bat, said bryndol quick decipher that, said jr rat perhaps he's boring, yes said lard, but now it's raining......oh how they ran to save bore tran, for they must find that weirdo man. guided by denz the bat, dot dot go this way dash go that. then pissing weird lair they espied, was it to late, was he inside. said jr rat i'll get a pole and stop him going down his hole. then into sight weird came a hopping, right passed his hole no sign of stopping. said jr rat, thats rather funny, there's something jumping in his tummy. said captain bryndol well im blowed, pissing weird has swallowed tone, and as the weird hopped out of sight, off they chased into the night.........at last they found him tired and boring, and pulled out tone who said where is he? for left alone i felt quite sick, and jumped into a hollow stick. said lard a clever step to take, you jumped into that slippery snake. that was brave of tone said rat, shut up you cunt said bat....... said captain bryndol to his men, ah we'll not see pissing weird again, and as they marched off down the road they sang in praise of boring tone, above them flew old denz the bat, with his wings stretched out quite flat. lards idea the clever fellow, to have a flying umberella........the bravest animals in the land are captain bryndol and his band, thats timid tone, jr rat, lard the owl and denz the bat. marching through woodlands singing songs that tell how they abuse young men in thongs.

ALAN AND UNCLE's

Ladies, have you tried every internet dating agency, ended up with nothing more than a darren giles lookalike, fed up of making endless conversation with people who have the same IQ as someone who sits in his bedroom all night watching sky sports 2, thinking your never going to meet mr right. Well girls, help is at hand. Alan and uncle offer you a quick and easy way to date fit young hunks with plenty of 4skin. Just leave your e mail address, contact telephone number and bust size in the comments box. Also, please give details of any bank balances or rich uncles. YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.